On the 6th of July I was in desperate need of a vacation. As most of you know I am primary president of a VERY large primary. It is often quite overwhelming. I have been feeling inadequate as a president. I love serving the children I love so much, they bring me so much joy. I have just felt that I am not a good leader, and pretty much a huge failure. I have spent much time on my knees pleading with the Lord to help me have the strength and peace as I continue to serve. I was unsure what I needed to do, so when my wonderful, kind parents called me on the 5th, and told me they had room in their hotel, I thought I should go. They were in Coronado, CA (just out of San Diego) and I figured it might be a good time and place to just quiet my mind. After church on Sunday I quickly packed, kissed David goodbye and headed for California. My plans were to return on Weds the 9th.
We had a wonderful day on Monday, went shopping, spent time on the beach and had a great dinner.
Tuesday morning brought very sad news. My Aunt Annetta had collapsed and was on life support in the hospital. Annetta is my mom's oldest sister that lived in Utah. Annetta had been very sick, with Anterior Horn Cell Disease. It is similar to Lou Gehrig's Disease. We had a family fast on the 6th for her health. The news was hard on all of us, especially my Mom.
Annetta passed away on Thursday Morning, so rather than drive back to Phoenix, Ethan and I followed my parents back to Vegas, then on to Utah for the Funeral.
I didn't get home until 10 pm on the 17th. I have driven way to many miles in such a short time, and I am weary. However I realized while driving last night what I have learned. I didn't receive the answer on how to be a great primary president, I have felt peace though. Also I need to keep life in perspective. "I" may not be the best president this primary has ever seen, but what is most important is that I am doing the best I can, and leave the rest to the Lord.
The small details don't matter, but the small children do. Life is short, and we need to live, love living, love to serve, and love those around us.
I am thankful for this trip / journey, to change my perspective.
The next few posts will be more detail on the days while I was gone.
ps check out Dave's blog, (it is the first link under family that blogs) he has some great new posts.
3 comments:
I love you, Janna! Thank you for sharing these thoughts. It's so beautiful to see how God lovingly teaches each of us individually in the way He knows will be best for us. I'm so glad you're back. You were missed!
Thanks for the rides in Utah. Glad you made it home safe and if you you needed thinking time I guess you got it. Nothing like a long drive with just your kid to make you think. Cute new page.
thanks for your thoughts, you are amazing and I am sooo glad you are my friend.
Post a Comment